Showing posts from 2014

Happy New Year to all the Supermarket Maniacs out there!

Happy New Year to all my fans! And to all my critics too!

Those who said it could not be done, well it most certainly is! Those who hoped for life on Mars, they found that life in my 3 books! Those who hold in their poop before finishing their exams, I feel sorry for them! Their calculators should be able to store that ---- too!

Part 4.. Should have been out this year. 2014 should have been the year for it all. Lets face facts. 2014 was the year for Part 4 to shoot forth from the womb. Why 2015 you say?

Busy. Busy. Busy. Hopefully, 2015 is less busy and more prosperous than the year gone by. Lost. I surely did.

No wins. No great book sales! Even though the book series has been place on the internet, in nearly each and every country, of the world. This is the reality of self publishing. And the unlimited space of the internet. Place the book on a site, it will probably sit there, for many years on end, before it either gets removed or stays there until a straggler picks it up. And mak…

Merry Christmas to all!

Just a second note to truly wish the onlookers here a Merry Christmas!

We hope for a future of peace, prosperity for all, in each and every corner of the world!

May no one ever see war, famine, or disease again. May we all truly feel the real message of Christmas, and get away from the materialistic, closet filling, yard sale garnering futures...

Spend the time with family, friends, and yep, even strangers... A message of kindness, even a warm hello, goes a long, long way...

Till next time, and thanks very much to the 11 followers on here, and the people from France, USA, Canada, and elsewhere that have been following this blog!

Christmas miracles... and the real deal.

Christmas miracles. Not sure if you had one. A sick relative coming home from the holidays of a near fatal illness, a person seen not for many lost decades gone by, a friendship renewed over old quarrels.

Christmas miracles, are the true gift of Christmas. Yours truly, only had the chance to meet one person who had claimed to be touched by a miracle of sorts. I thought, and still do, believe I was truly blessed to hear this persons testimony of his miraculous healing. It took me aback, and realized that there is some wonderful things that can indeed happen to people around the holiday season, or during the year at any time at all.

Although rare, we all champion them, and we all hope they can break the chains of despair. Somehow these stories keep us going, and keep us wondering on how such events can be explained by modern science. Breaking all common explanations, watching some predicaments go the other way.

It could be a persons thought pattern, an alcoholic giving up the booze, a …

Missed deadlines and what not

Sure, I set a deadline in my head. To be finished of Part 4 before Christmas. I am thinking that I will not be able to reach that set deadline, in my head. Not to worry, there is no one knocking at the door for its creation. My fans are not screaming into the streets, or creating mayhem down the road. That possibly was the other reason for its late creation. It may have severed its creation completely. But, the great reviews and ratings tallied up so far, was the main reason for the continuation of the series. Out of 44 reviews or ratings, it was a rarity to get under a 2 star rating. Very rare, for this series, which helped the series get to a Part 4.

And Part 4 could have been done several months ago, I am sure, if its popularity would have been high. Family members would have been more understanding towards its creation, and probably would have left me with more time to work at it. It could have been completed this early fall, if things went the other way.

But when do things go co…

Part 4 is getting there..

Part 4 is now around 62 000 words, and only the last battle scene to finalize. Need to dot the i's, and cross the t's.  This will be close to Part 3's length, that is for certain. I am sure to get at least over a thousand pages total of odd situation humor, a milestone I hope I can achieve in the near future.

I probably will finish it this week, and then the second and third readings, spell checking each time, and then probably look for a local editor to keep costs down. Hoping to find someone in the area that can do some great editing for me, and they will get a free read too! Tell me what does not tie up in the book, and what should be left in or left out of the process, to a small degree. There is an old friend in the area, who I can talk to about this. I think he can lead me to an editor, if he does not have the time to do it himself.

The book cover will probably be drawn out by yours truly again, and I already have a few ideas for it. There is a space shuttle or vess…

Part 4 at 60 000 words so far.

Part 4 is at 60 000 words so far, and there is approximately one scene to finish. Then, the big job of going through the grammar and spell check, cutting out some cheesy elements, or adding detail to many situations in the many hysterics that take place within the first draft.

I am very pleased with this volume of the series. It maybe, just as great as the rest of them. I feel it holds true to the series, in its zany fashion with its characters and what not. Maybe it could be the best in the total of 4 series, but each volume is very special in their own way.

Not sure right now if it will be as big as Part 3, but it could very well match it once I get into the editing and what not. Never found cleaning up the mess I created fun stuff. If you are a writer, and going through your own material not once, but twice, three times, it can be tiring and exhausting at times. And then once you send it to get edited somewhere else, it comes back, you have to go through it probably once or twice-…

Progress on Part 4 to date

Part 4 has been doing very well. It will probably surpass Part 2 s length most certainly, and may come close to Part 3 s length which was 300 pages.

Part 4 only has perhaps a scene and a half left,  and then the touch ups. As stated previously, I need to read through it several times, and then add or probably delete some items. The ending is an epic fight, with lava flows, and the world on edge! The world could self destruct in an instant!

Will I be able to finish the book, by January of 2015?  To have published by June of 2015 ( it takes usually 4 to 6 months to publish once in the process, and I have previously submitted the book covers to make it go faster) I could wait until the fall of next year too, as the market is not open to my sort of style of writing. My fans are not actually waiting at the doorstep for Part 4. Maybe I could should just shelve it. Not sure what to do lately.

By submitting the book covers, I have done very poorly at attracting an audience. Do I need someone…

Part 4 's progress to date

Part 4 has been moving along rather well. Thought of a few more ideas, and the motion of events keeps expanding, the crazy situations keep extending outwards too.

I have probably, roughly, two more scenes to complete to get to the 99 % completion factor, as described below. I expect this week to obtain the 99 % factor, and then the other 1 % is cleaning up the text, which grammar and punctuation will be corrected to the best of my ability.

When in the 1 % zone, it means when proofreading it, many changes could occur within the text. This was briefly described below as well.

Not sure if this book will compare in length to Part 3. It will probably be closer in length to Part 2, but one can never tell.

The main character always seems to have a hard time with one of his friends in each volume, and this one is no different, due to the mismatch in personalities.

Right now, I have to figure out how the main character gets out of an explosive situation. Need to do some real, deep thinking. A…

The whole "Supermarket Guy" humor series could very well pass an important milestone!

The whole "The Supermarket Guy" humor series, could pass an important milestone with the creation of Part IV.

It could mean a thousand pages in print size, for the pocket sized book! It may fall just under, or just above the thousand page mark.

This is an achievement which I thought I would not reach, as the creation of Part 2 was a big question. Part 3 was an even bigger question, as the sale results from the two first books were dismal. Part 3 started late because of the poor starts on the first two, and now Part 4 is lagging behind approximately 6 months to a year from a year to year production date, due to low sales volumes.

This is probably why Part 4 has taken so long, and is indeed, behind schedule. Taking my time with this one, due to the poor attraction for the series (although the reviews have been 4.0 out of 5.0 for the whole series- from 43 reviews)

Part 4 will definitely be the last one, unless it performs very well. After this one, I may hang up my hat. It app…

Great progress on Part 4.

Today, I had some great progress on Part 4. The book is coming together better than expected, and could be possibly the best in the series.

It may rival the length in Part 3,  but not sure. It is bigger than Part 1 at this instant, and around the same size as Part 2. But, I am not finished this Part 4 yet, so it could be bigger than Part 2, or even Part 3.

I have still around 2 scenes to complete, but sometimes on scene can grow into a little more action, or humor in between, as what has happened today.

Then when editing the material, it should grow a little more again ( more descriptive writings, and putting in some things that I may have left out), usually calls for the main body to grow as well.

I am at around 52 000 words now. We will see how the rest goes.

Till next time.

3 scenes to go and part 4's body is 99 % complete

Yes, part 4 is 99 % complete after I finish the next 3 scenes.

Then the other 1 %, is just mending the fences. Cleaning the text, adding a bit of humor, subtracting some cheesiness, making it fit together better ( the times, the action, all has to fit)

To find the time to get the other three scenes completed... Maybe two weeks time.. Maybe.. I got family calling on me just now... Have to go again@!

Another scene completed yesterday.

The ending was completed yesterday, of Part 4. It was an ending that drug on for awhile, but it added for 6 more pages of zaniness. What is left, is 3 scenes to a conflict scene, then I have to hop over and do the entrance scene to a fortress and finish up another conflict scene.

After that, what is needed to be done is to brush it all up. Spellcheck, reread for flow and see if the content matches up with events later on in the musings, perhaps expand some paragraphs, maybe take some out. It always usually leads to a longer text, when I perform these functions.

It is probably because I am not a descriptive writer as I should be, and I need to refocus more on the elements that make people see what is really going on in a certain area or situation. How much is needed, and when is too much is too much detail?  Then the humor element. Need to cut out the overly amount of cheesy material. Loved the scary movie series, but I am trying to keep it a little realistic. A little more than those…

Part 4's progress to date

Been sick again this weekend, terrible cough and sinus trouble. Seems to be better today, and yesterday I did not feel like writing at all, but I pushed myself towards the keyboard and began to type away. I thought I might be ruining the newly written text by writing when sick, but it all seemed to mend in the book very well.

I managed to write about 5 pages, and could have continued if the time permitted. I put in some key elements that were missing already in the main text, some linking material, scenes, and it seemed to flow very well.

What is left to do?  Approximately 5 to 6 scenes, but who knows. I always like to gauge where I am in near completion of a book, as the scenes are already in my head, now having just to put them on paper to finish the text.

This could take another 3 to 5 days of writing, depending on how busy I am with things around the house or family affairs.

Now, the other problem of finding the money to publish it. Still thinking of the kindle option, to keep co…
Might as well post the review right here, as Goodreads does not at times put the latest review at the top:

"The Supermarket Guy 3: Supermarket Dominium" which I won through Goodreads Giveaways is the next book in a series that looks at the madcap hijinx in the food industry as Jon Acadou' s foster son not only concocts an ambitious plan which includes the control of his foster father's supermarket empire but also conquest of the world. The story begins with CEO Harold Wannapus's desire to grow his supermarket business while his rival John Acadou is behind bars when suddenly his customers are clamoring for edmundo's products. With Acadou's escape from prison and his newfound faith he does little to stem Edmund's diabolical plan which includes development of a mind-controlling drug to be distributed in their cola product. Only when Jon teams up with his rival Harold can the two stop Edmund's plan to dominate the world.

As the quirky events unfold the …

Another 4 on 5 star rating- Another and another and another...

Read this latest 4 on 5 star rating review from Goodreads.  The only thing wrong, was the book cover. I can take the prunes with the whiskey in one glass, no problem!

Thanks to the reviewer, and hopefully more reviews to come!

Few ideas on hold... To busy with affairs at the ranch.

Unfortunately, I have had some great ideas for Part 4 the other day. Yet, work, family affairs kept me from the writing board. Even today,  the family wants me to go and do some errands again today. Keeping me from a good hour or two on the keyboard, putting down my much wanted ideas to try to help expedite the completion of part 4.

Usually this is the way it goes. It is a good thing there are no deadlines attached to my writing. It does give me allot of space, freedom, and time to get things done at, albiet, a much slower pace.

It helps when you have allot of support in your family, in order to give yourself more time to get your affairs in order. Over the past few years, I have been doing everything on my own.

I will try to get some writing done tonight, if the time permits.  The weather is terrible today, so maybe I may stick inside and get some things going... Before my real job comes calling again..

The book is probably 80 % finished now,  but there are at least 8 scenes to put…

Thought about some great ideas for Part 4.

A few more ideas came to me on Part 4, strong humorous ones, that could produce another 2 pages or so on this book. I had to write them down quickly, as the mind can forget about this stuff within minutes of their conjuring, forever to be lost until they resurface maybe many years down the track. All this was done while the main body, or main scenes, were and still headed for the finish line.

This reinforces the main body of the text, going in the right direction with the rest of the series. I call these little moments of conjuring, cementing, the main text. It is like pouring the concrete around the iron bars, creating a stronger text for the main body.

Now, what must be done in heading down the track to the finish line, is making sure events happen at the right time, to achieve maximum effect.

Maximum effect,  by doing an action earlier,  you may help the body of the text elsewhere by expanding much more on this effect than if done later. It is easy for a writer to find the locatio…

Another 4 on 5 star rating ( no review) for part 3

Another 4 on 5 star rating, no review, for Part 3 of The Supermarket Guy.

This is a welcoming sight, as there was not many ratings coming along for the longest time.  This one came from a lady from Australia, and much thanks goes out for that rating.

Today, I wrote another 5 to 6 pages of Part 4.  It is developing really well. I honestly did not have the time to do some writing today, but when having the ideas as strong as what I had them over the past little while, I had no choice to write about them, or risk losing the ideas along the way.

This is the most difficult time for me, as it stands now. Not much time to do anything, work, and not having the money to finish Part 4 properly.

I will do it up, probably as an unedited version, in Kindle format.  As this is the least expensive way to go, with the series now.  It is not my first choice, but sometimes in life, you have to go with the second choice when situations deem it necessary. At least it will be available, for those who tru…

Now at 180 pages in my novel size format for Part 4

Part 4 of The Supermarket Guy is now at 180 pages in paperback format. I managed to do 3 pages the other day, and things are thickening up for the plot.  The world, conspiracy, and humor are all on the forefront of this book.

Still quite busy as of late, but things are chugging along, which is the mainstay. This book could be released after Christmas, or later in time, due to time constraints and lack of funding.

This book will offer a powerful humor punch, if I can get it off into production. Hopefully it will all link up, and make it at least on the e book shelves...

Till next time.

Montreal! Montreal! Montreal- Library, that is!

Currently happy to announce that my 3 books, the total of the series, are available on the Library system in Montreal!  A person who really wanted to read them up that way, said that since I am a Canadian author, that the books should be in a true Canadian Library!

I cannot think of anything truer than Montreal! Montreal! Montreal-  Library that is.. I am not talking about Les Canadiens, their prestigious hockey team! The most successful hockey team of all time!

So if you live in Montreal, check it out on your way past any Library system in the city! The citizens of Montreal are lucky today, and thanks for the Libraries good work in the acquisition of these star players!

* If you are from Montreal, pass the word along-  Please give me a few reviews, on Amazon, or wherever you may do your reading.. And thanks...

Till next time.

80 % done with "The Supermarket Guy IV"

Done more work to "The Supermarket Guy 4", was lucky to get a page to two pages and a half done. This was mostly cementing material-  work that went into the body of the text, to strengthen the story line.

I realized that I was bringing in some minor details from the events in Part 3, which could be deleted and expanded upon in a different way. And perhaps, a more humorous way. For this to take place, I had to go into the text and add, delete some parts of the text. But the additions proved more material for the body of the main text. And, this will lead to another action scene, somewhere down the road as well. I needed these very important links to make the story flow better, and to ensure connectivity and purpose to the story.

The book maybe 80 % done now,  but I am very busy as of late, with family issues and work. I do not know if I can finish the book for the fall of 2014. It seems like too long of a process right now.  Perhaps in 2015, near January, or later in March,…

A blazing hot 4 on 5 star review for "The Supermarket Guy 3"

A blazing hot review for "The Supermarket Guy 3"-  here are some of the comments extracted from the review site!

This book was really good! There was incredible comedy, occasional childishness (added ore silliness to the comedy. Always a plus!), sheepmen and amazing-ness! I was laughing every time I picked this book up. An added bonus is that the author made the cover! How awesome is that! I a definitely recommending this book for the comedy alone. It's a fun (and really funny!) book to read!

A 4 on 5 star review-  thanks to the readers, again and again and....

4 on 5 star review for "The Supermarket Guy 3"

Today I received a 4 on 5 star review for "The Supermarket Guy 3" humor book.

Comments that stood out for me were "At first this book had me all sorts of confused but once I got into I realized this book has it all. -"

No doubt, the beginning was very trivial to me. Should I go with it, entertain that sort of direction, or completely change the first chapter. But, when realizing the total gist of the movement, the total theme of the book had to be going that way. And to go that way, the beginning had to be serious, and I tried to add sparkle to beginning of the book by adding some slight humor. This was indeed, very difficult, but it appears it may have thrown off some readers- a good and bad thing all in one, perhaps. Maybe not, especially if they read it right to the end.

Thanks to the reader for this great review,

Till the next time...

3 on 5 star review for "The Supermarket Guy 3"

Glad to have received a 3 on 5 star rating / review for "The Supermarket Guy 3" today.

Some comments that stood out for myself, personally, were "A really humorous book-" , and "Got a good chuckle out of it-" , and the man revealed that he will give it to his growing daughter once she can understand this type of humor.

Quite evident from that review that I do have a certain style of humor, and glad that this review revealed that as well. More reviews to come,  but overall, from 95 % approx. - all the reviews received so far shows that the book is a truly humorous read.

Thanks to the readers, till next time...

Been sick for awhile.

Caught another flue bug a little while ago, and still under the weather currently today. Coughing, nearly non stop at times, and this is what I usually get every 2 to 3 years, or sometimes more frequently. My family physician was booked for the next few weeks, so I took a trip to another doctor at a walk in clinic.  There, the usual pulse rates, temperature, and what not were taken. Listening to my lungs with a stethoscope, hearing the wheeze of a mild congestion. Not pneumonia, just a little congestion.

The coughing was not a severe as the first day I got the bug. I would cough nearly non stop, and even could manage a half hour of sleep every so often during the night. Laying down seems to exacerbate the coughing, and even last night, as the cold weaned off from its massive thrust, I still coughed every few hours at a time when laying down.

What I tried this time, was Robitusin cough medicin, and tylenol "cough" tablets. The mucus did come up, and it was white. This was ra…

Marijunapla makes the finest meatballs!

Meatballs. They are the essence of every spaghetti sauce. The dream of every hamburger bun. The brain of every wing nut that you ever knew in life.

Marijunapla made a great meatball sauce. A super spaghetti sauce, that kept the customers coming back for more.. You guessed it! Meatball heartiness fun!

She served up a wicked sauce, with several helpings of pasta! It was only until on day, when Rosalandini finished off his third plate of spaghetti at her diner, that he informed her of a new spaghetti shop that would open soon just a block away from her diner.

"Marijunapla, your spaghetti sauce is divine! But, I must tell you about no lies!" as he held his hands to the sky "A new spaghetti meatball diva is now in town! Her meatballs are soft, moist, and when the meat hangs between the peoples teeth, they tell me they all fail to brush their shiny pearly whites at night! They rather go to bed with the awesome, lingering, meaty taste of her finely seasoned meat under their t…

Got around the problem in Part 4

Just got around the problem in Part 4. I presented a difficult challenge 2/3 rds through the book, and I changed it so the main character got through with little difficulty, and actually did a good deed while in chaos. More humor added to the situation, with another character barking at his ability to not have any fear.

Now the voyage to a secret facility, then to another one or two secret facilities. Need to keep writing, as I added 5 pages just today. Maybe more will come to me tomorrow, but I rather write a little bit every day, as to try to keep the ideas fresh and the mind clear.

Till next time...

Supermarket Guy 4- more progress made.

More progress was made last night, on Part 4 I had written another 2 or 3 pages, and had to pause as I got my characters into a mess in which I had to think of a way to get out of it.

A natural disaster, a gun battle, an contagion outbreak, a love situation, there are many things you can throw at your character, and then after you need to figure out if this is the way you should go or not.  Is it too powerful of a situation for your human or superhuman character to get out of? Is it believable, and should it be believable? In writing fiction, I think you are safe to throw whatever you want at the outcome of things.

We all seen fast, unexplained escapes from certain situations on tv, film, or plays. I am trying to keep it as near believable as possible, and hopefully I can continue down that path.

Right now the main characters are heading towards something, and I need to figure out a way on how they will escape it. I still have to act on the other characters, as they had not much of a…

The Supermarket Guy 4- Subtitle top secret

The Supermarket Guy 4's progress has been steady over the last few weeks. I had time to write a few pages last week, and the ideas continued to flow.

With approximately 70 % complete ( as compared to my other books in the line up in total pages), this could be a really long book. 

The problems I have right now, is linking up the characters to the various events that are happening around them. Trying to decide whether or not to delete some scenes, leave some in, or go into another direction with the main focus. Then, to decide if the action should go to a different scene, a different location, how to get there and what not. Or just have it quickly get to the climax, and just make a shorter book. With no deadlines, it makes it much easier just to take the time to make it, perhaps, a little longer in length this time.

Very interesting, and I am sure many authors are in the same thought process on to how to achieve a supermarket kind of ending ;)

Hopefully I will be able to finish it this…

A 3 on 5 star rating and review for my book, just today.

Here is a very interesting description for my book, from a 3 on 5 rating I got today.  An excerpt of a very long review.

---The story reads much like an outrageous cartoon where improbable things are constantly happening and the scene is changing so frequently that you feel like it is giving you ADD.---

That is actually what the book was intended to do, and I am happy that it was fast moving, and such. My writings are fast moving, and am thankful for this persons review.

Direct Deposit, Governments, and the Banks

Just a little while ago, I got news that a relative of mine will have to direct deposit his Canada Pension Plan cheque, as no more cheques will be issued after a year or so. I have many older relatives near the 80 ish age, while the majority do opt for direct deposit, there were still a healthy minority opting for a cheque in the mail.

They were all told that this is due to the savings that are necessary to reduce paper, energy, and probably manpower costs at the government mailing department. While a mailing may cost 88 c,  direct deposit costs probably around 13 or so cents (  Millions can be saved, so the government says.

But, to a principle of point, they are also giving direct deposit only to banks, credit unions, also.

Where a person can understand the expediency of direct deposit ( Yours truly goes that way too), because most companies will only pay through that method.

I remem…

Another 4 on 5 star review for "The Supermarket Guy 3"

Another 4 on 5 star review for "The Supermarket Guy 3", just received this morning. Here are a few comments from the reader.

-- I liked how the book was kept light and even though the characters were beyond oblivious to their surroundings, things always seemed to work out for Harold. ---

Once again, thanks to the readers, as 94 % of people "liked" the book thus far...

Please read below to entertain yourself on my humor posts, and thanks for stopping by!

There is a new superhero in town- Capitaine Recyler!

Capitiane Recycler was flying over Wasteville, when he seen a lady toss plastic bottle out of her car while driving in the woods.  Capitaine Recycler whooshed down at great speed, with his super hero suit made out of recycled tires, his cape made out of old carpets, and his mask made out of old tampons!

"Lady!", he yelled, as he began to fly close up to the renegade jeep at full speed down the country road. He was swallowing some dust, as he had the empty plastic bottle in his hand.  She looked at him in a stunned manner, as he was flying just close to to her now. He showed her the plastic bottle and pointed to it "This bottle is recyclable, and you can get five cents on a refund! That money can go into the stock market to invest in a recyclable company and pay you out double!"

The young lady looked at her husband who was driving, "Not another creepy superhero! Watch this, darling!" He was heading close to a road that winded in and out near a cliff. He t…

Another Great Review for Part 3!

A recently posted 4 on 5 star review for Part 3. Here is what the person had to say about the story:

----This book sort of took me back to childhood- I always enjoyed funny and outlandish stories. Now I found one for adults!

This book kept me entertained (and laughing!) throughout!----

Very thankful for the support, glad that I could spark some laughter in some peoples homes.  Did think of many more hilarious scenarios for Part 4 last night.  Will try to write some more later on, if time permits.

Thanks to the readers for their kind support!

Part 4, is still uncertain for the continuation of the series.

Was talking to some friends the other day,  as Part 4 seems to be a wrench thrown into the gears. With low sales,  the advice was not sound to continue to churn out books to continue on the series. They tell me I should throw in the towel. Wave the white flag. Get some comfort food, like bacon and eggs.

With 60 % of Part 4 done, it would appear my writing has developed into a kind of airplane stall. Oddly enough, the flow of ideas from the mind were quite positive in reaching the end result to this book, but the time was not there to write much at all.

It would appear now that Part 4 could be released as a Kindle only version on Amazon, if I could get to the finishing point. It would be poorly edited, and at a low price. This is the question, I had been asking myself for the last few months. Should I put it out there as a kindle, only version, and have the benefit of the 99 cent e book sales price, and worry pas?  At 99 cents, who would care about the editing, and if people really wa…

The real Supermarket Dominium in real life.

Supermarket Dominium. What does it mean? It means the race of the big grocers to dominate, control, supermarket supply. Be number one in the sales of the food that you bring home to consume.

An interesting development has taken place, in the last year or so in Canada. This has taken place in the United States probably for quite a while, as Wal Mart has been entering the grocery market. As well, they have taken my book on their internet shelves, to my gleeful content as well.

Could it just have been a coincidence, where the retailing giant has already captured approximately 30 % of Mexicos grocery market. I wonder what will happen to Loblaws, Sobeys, and the rest of the gang here in Canada.

First of all, I expect lower share prices for the above companies. And they are the only two companies that I mention here. Local co ops, and other mom and pop grocery stores, will see market shares go down as well.

Wal Mart. What a great time to invest into your shares, over the next 2 to 5 years.…

Universe Gladiator Part 6- The Final Battle to Glory!

Mokei then slowed down his ship. Alarms were going off like insanity. Warning alarms! Harold began dancing, as he thought it was a new disco hit from Lady Gaga!  Mokei screamed "Harold, the Foamers have us surrounded. Their ten ships are aiming their foaming guns at us now! We are doomed!"

The Supermarket Guy winced "Quick, get me the leader of the Foamers on the screen right now! We need to establish a bluff, and you leave this to me!'

Mokei opened the intergallactic airwaves to the evil Totalitarian Foam Warrior, the leader of the pack. He talked before issuing his order to strike the single vessel from Oblirigon. "You got allot of nuts, coming here alone.. Alone... To take on the might of the whole foamer fleet! So, it is you, Mokei! How did you ever get out of being foamed! Well, no matter. You will be foamed again, and this time we will make sure you will never make it out for a million light years!"

Mokei yawned, pretending to be tired "I have …

Universe Gladiators- Part 5 ( Sometimes, a hoola hoop may come in handy)

Mokei was now approaching his planet after being led there by his mighty space jets. Harold looked at the viewing screen, which depicted the planet as a large gob of hardened foam. He could see a dot, working away trying to break through its hard crust. Whoever it was, he was hardly making an impact.

"That dot down there, breaking through the foam at an excruciating slow rate. He must be a government worker on your planet, forced to work for to save his planet. Why, if i was down there, I could have broke free half of your planet by now!", as Harold let go a passage of gas.

Mokei smelled the sweet smelling fragrance "Wannapus, master, please, how did you know he was a teacher? My instructor! You are greatly wise. But please, do not cut the cheese when on this ship. Methane to us is like heroine, and it makes me think crazy. Why, I could put my nose up your...."

Harold pushed Mokei away "Alright, I get it. I will hold it in, until I can get a match to light he…

Universe Gladiators- Part 4 ( Drinkin beer tonight so I might as well finish her off)

Mokei nearly cried "Our planet has been foamed, Wannapus! Foamed hardened, by the dreaded Foamers from the planet foam!"  Harold coughed in his hand for a minute "Yeah, right, sure... But keep calling me master, I do like that title. After all, I am number one in supermarket sales, the world over, yet again for the 10 th year straight!  Why should I care about you, Mokei, and your silly little story"

Mokei fell to his knees "Master, soon the foamers will come here, and foam your beautiful planet. You need to come with me, immediately, to show me the way you fight your evil nemesis, Acadou.. Otherwise, your sales maybe zilch when they foam your entire supermarket empire!!!"

Harold thought about this for a half second, and replied "Enough said! Like I need foam gel in my hair to look good, like that sickening Jon Acadou! Get me aboard your ship, and let me drive! I am a great driver, by the way!"

Mokei smiled, and realized he had found the key to…

Universe Gladiators- Part 3. Wannapus is an alien???

Mokei landed his space ship on Harold Wannapus's back lawn. It was midnight, and it was a full moon. Harold was dreaming of doing the hoola hoop world record champion, and was just seconds from achieving the near 73 hours had gone bye, yet a bright light in the sky opened his eyelids wide.  "Damn!", he whispered loudly, "I nearly broke the record in my dreams! That meant that reality would soon follow in its footsteps!"  He got up slowly, as he did not want to wake his wife, Lucie Wannapus from her deep slumber. She had played scrabble in Chinese all night, against him who was cheating with a Chinese pictionary.

He ran out to his back yard, as Mokei walked down from the landing deck. Mokei said "I come in peace, Wannapus, and from a planet, many airmiles away!"  Harold looked confidently at the alien, who had 4 eyes and a long nose, 6 arms, and twenty toes "You got allot of toes. Have you come for my electric nail clipper. I had just invented it…

Universe Gladiator- Part 2- (Finding the perfect Gladiator instructor)

Mokie cried, as he could see his planet was solidified to the point of desperation! "Damn those foamers! Do they have any inkling of mercy at all?"  He hugged his intelligence tribal officer, as he pushed him back. He glared at him resoundingly "Give me your carbide tipped egg beater. I will start to remove the hardened mass from our beautiful planet. It may take several ions, but who cares. It has to be done. I have a box of oreos, a strange meal from earth, but it will give me lots of energy to do what I must do. And this pond of semi toxic water, will be alright for me, as we are a tough planetary race! What you must do is go to a planet called earth. You need to talk to a real gladiator, a real universe gladiator, and learn how to fight and defend our planet, once again!"

Mokie reached up to the stars, and screamed "Earth! That dirty, polluted old planet! The humans are so busy playing Super Mario, how will they ever come to my aid! Last time I traveled t…

Universe Gladiators - Part 1 (Star Wars, Star Trek who???)

Captain Mokei, was flying his ship with his mind. He flew it with his mind forever, since he was a baby in his cyclonic diaper. It is a diaper that shoot out waste in a high velocity cyclone, into orbit, from his beautiful planet of Oblirigon. He was travelling at the speed of light, and heading towards the outskirts of the coffee bean galaxy. This galaxy was full of black holes, meteorites, and comets.

Much danger, but not enough for this war ready captain. He served in many intergalactic wars, against his dreaded foe, the Foam Throwers. The Foam Throwers had a spaceship in the shape of a great aerosol can, and would shoot out the foam beam as fast as a laser. The foam usually surrounded the ship, and made it as hard as a meteorite, making the ship useless. That was until Captain Mokeis ship was sprayed on, and he put space age high carbide metal on his super sonic can opener, did he chip his way out.  After many light years, he finally drilled the last bit off of his ship. He was n…

The Supermarket Guy 4 , over halfway done.

The Supermarket Guy 4, is nearly halfway done. It carries on from the same style of humor, as previously seen in Part 1, 2 and 3.

It will make for an exciting cliffhanger in the end, if I can make it that far.  The process is going well, but the body needs to carry it through to the end.

I had much difficulty earlier this afternoon, in keeping the flow going. The ideas were not coming in quite as fast as they usually do, but tonight, I patched and retorqued allot of the paragraphs, which caused the story to be highly entertaining and as zany as the rest.

Hopefully I can continue until the end, towards the cliffhanger. It will take some time, as the time is not there like it used to be for my writing... Also, the sales are not there either....

I will have to do this one on the cheap, if I can finish this one up... Maybe publish in the fall?  Just an E book version.. Probably yes..

Till next time

Another 5 on 5 star rating!

Just received, yet another 5 on 5 star rating, this May 11/04.

That puts part 3 at eight 5 on 5, with three 4 on 4, then a one on 5 star- a mistake from a person, so she said... But she did not correct it yet... Oh well.

Thanks for the 5 on 5 star rating, as this propels part 3 still around the 4. 2 on 5 star average..

Till next time...

A true spaghetti western!

Mr. Blud, AT Smokin, and Beefbrand were all sitting at a wild west saloon somewhere on the Texas plains. A 20 horse town, so to speak, with lots of gold mining, cattle ranging, and whiskey making.  There was everything in this small plains town, to be contented with....  Yes, even, their spaghetti was the best in the west!  So their trigger happy chef, proclaimed.

Mr Blud ordered up a meatball supreme, from Master Chef Trigger Happy. He dug deep down in the pot, and reached for the softest, juiciest meatballs!  He fired them on top of the heapen helpin of spaghetti within minutes, and then slid the plate down carefully to the gunslinger from the north.

At Smokin asked for the hotest spaghetti sauce you could find!  Al Dente, too! Only made from the hottest peppers from Mexico, and the hottest Chilis, he served up a scorchin, hot, sauce that could weld your lips shut if you just ate it too fast at once...  Smokin was the gunslinger from the South.  The Chef served him up a hot plate..

18 five on five star ratings out of 30.

Just a update on my ratings so far. Currently, there is 18 five on five star ratings for my 3 books out of 30. The books have done very well, and am glad that the ratings show that the books do offer a funny, and entertaining story.

Thanks to the readers!  Till next time..

I was under da influenza when I bought your product....

Johapat Ricapuke was a good man. He worked hard, for his income. He cared about his job, as he was the top shoe lace insert man at his shoe factory in Lisbon. He won shoe lace insert "person" of the year in the shoe lace olympics, and was a good beer drinker. There was nothing not to like about this shoe lace person.

But, then he began binge drinking at work. Sometimes he would tie knots in the shoes that were shipped out to the sports shops. Angry retailers would mail the company back, and protest... Eventually, warnings came to the shoe lace tie guru, from up above... Management told him to try to lay off of the booze a bit, but to most importantly stop tying knots in their high quality shoes.... Or they could lose sales, sponserships, and what not.. So in a daring threat, the cut his wages by 10 %.

10 %... Well, Johapat Ricapuke was stunned. So stunned, he talked to his lawyer, honest Ronest. Ronest told him "Listen, Johapat.. You just forget about your pay cut.. Yo…

Doctor Insano starts selling bottled water....

Doctor Insano was at his desk, figuring out how to make more money. Sure, he had lots of healthy patients, and that was not making him any richer at the moment, right now. The governments preventative health care, yoga, and heavy taxed calorie reduced beer was working...

But Doctor Insano, had a idea.. A bottled water plant.. He had the money, the intelligence, to get this operation going.. His wife, and his son who liked to play nintendo all day, could help him realize his dream of massive profits... And why not?

He then placed a submersible pump into his frog pond out back... Pumped it through a sock, to get rid of the green ting to the sour tasting water.. Eureka! He had done it..

He needed a nifty name to explain the sour, and smelly taste of the water... He needed a macho name for his water, in order to mask the smell and the sour taste.. He called it, Bear Pee H20. On the bottle, there was a slogan- It may make you jump a little higher, dance a little wilder, but its awesome, g…

What? Another 5 on 5 star rating....

Another 5 on 5 star rating for "The Supermarket Guy 3" humor book!  Sometimes ratings take many days to come through to Goodreads, as it can be found on the ratings review link...

This was once again, totally unexpected... I am thankful...

Till next time...

Another 5 on 5 star review from Goodreads.

I now have 6 - 5 on 5 star ratings, 3- 4 on 4 ratings, 1- 3 on 5 star ratings, and one - 1 on 5 star rating, for my book on Goodreads.

The last 5 on 5 star rating that I got just a little while ago, was a complete surprise. I had to look real hard to find the rating, but it was hidden there in the 5 on 5 star column. It tells me that the book is another strong arm to the series, and that it has outperformed my expectations thus far.

I am thankful for this, even though the sales have not been there. As it stands now,  it is R.I.P. for "The Supermarket Guy" series, and the hero, Harold Wannapus. He will not make it for a Part 4 series, as the Mozart Requiem plays on from Part 3. I will continue to post a few updates on here, but eventually, I may deconstruct this site come near December should things not improve.

I will always have my Goodreads presence, hopefully, and the books should always be available for sale, unless I would like them to become Antiquarian. I could haul …

A 4 star on 5 review from Goodreads...

Today, I garnered another 4 on 5 star rating, and review, from Goodreads.  A very good review, as this person admitted the story was indeed funny, and different.

Below is the link to the review. Just scroll down to the review section to see it, as this was probably the one of the best reviews of the book ever. This review is for Part 3, of The Supermarket Guy.

This is exactly how the book was exposed to connect with people,  which I have failed to do.  The ladies comment at first as to - "wtf am I reading? " ,  but in the end, she totally understood what she was reading.

It all came together at the end.. Yet there are so many themes to the book... That was not discussed in this review, either...  But, did a good job in conveying the message that the book is just pure fun, and zany.

Yep. That is how the world was exposed to  perceive the book as a total throw back to conventional literature, in a sense that i…

Steel Heart: High Tech Warrior of the 1300s- The kinda reckoning but not really realizing it until the time passes

Hoodie helped put on Steel Heart's new metal armor with ceramic heat resistant coating. He gave him his 50 foot long sword, the sheath, and his miniature yet deadly shoulder mounted catapult. He was now ready for war with the Dragon!

He mounted his reliable, steady steed with his new armaments. The horse only made a few steps, in the main castle hall, but collapsed due to the heavy weight of the new equipment. The townsfolk laughed, as King Paladium whispered to his wife "He surely will not win against this Dragon. The best I can hope for, is for him to die. Then I will send my armies in to slay the village, and then the peasants of the nearby village. They are not fashionable like we are, you know"  He then raised his arms "Good luck, Steel Heart, on slaying the dragon", as he watched him gather his stuff, and began to walk slowly towards the castles drawbridge.

Steel Heart panted heavy, and sweat began to bead from his forehead "I do this only for glory…