Billionaire Harold Wannapus envies the Solar Planes record so he builds a solar submarine!
One scientist held up his pen near the dock to ask a question before he got in "Your submarine has solar panels at the top, to absorb the earths rays! How fast does your submarine go on a full tank of the suns energy?"
Harold smiled back and responded "Oh, it will go at at least 200 knots. We constructed this submarine to be as nimble and agile as a turtle, that actually ploughs the water forward as to create the impression of rising sea levels for all kids to enjoy when sloshing near the shore! Next question that I can obviously answer, please!"
Someone from CNONO news channel quipped "Do you have enough foodstuffs for your voyage? That is always the problem with these voyages, keeping the mass of the vessel down as to conserve energy!"
Harold laughed and hauled out his fishing rod "Ahh, you ask a very simple question. The answer is right here, and I surely will jig a humpback whale and save us much energy in our voyage towards the artic. We can piggy back on many of a tuna, if we truly do not go hungry and lose it and begin eating our crewmates, if you know what I mean!"
Another news reporter from KLOP FLOP asked "So now for your bowl movements. So much restricted space on such a meticulously designed vessel. When you do your number 2, what will you do to save flushing water and the planet!"
Harold clapped his hands together "Great question, probably the only good question I recieved yet this year! Well, we figure on this 10 day voyage, we can just let it run out on the floor, as building a toilet in this high tech machine was not an option due to the weight. Problem being we cannot just open the hatch and do it outside, at a mile below the oceans surface. A butt hole collapses at that ocean pressure, as many of a scientific book may relate too. Ok, enough questions, on with the journey"
Everyone applauded, and yelled "Harold the earths green thumb, Harolds is the earths green thumber!"
It made him so excited he yelled back just before closing the hatch to his solar submarine "My 100 million dollar submarine of the solar nature will make the ocean much cleaner and suitable for penguin farming! Time to start our voyage!"
He locked the two top hatches, and got down in his specially designed cockpit with his co pilot, Pete.
Pete started the engines and started a hard descend down to a depth of 80 feet. Suddenly the motor stopped. The engines would not turn. It said on the mainframe computer, battery power low. Battery power low.
Wannapus slammed his fist on the screen "We only moved ten feet. What is wrong with this blasted sub, Pete!"
Pete whimpered "It appears we cannot get any charge at this depth for our solar panels for our subs! We are stuck here at the bottom of the Ocean, with only 10 days of mush food supply and a vhs tape of the fireplace crackling channel!"
Harold cried "Have you lost your mind, man. The VHS tape takes power from our batteries! No crackling fireplace in here, we are for sure doomed!"