What? Penguin Man has to save the world? Why can't he just twiddle his thumbs?

Part 3


Paulifios then picked up a weary Janito, and waddled at a super fast speed to the shore. There, he dropped Janito on a huge slab of washed up ice, that was lunged on the shore by violent torrents. He was lost, but somehow felt confident. His new powers also gave him a new pysch of fearlessness.

Clouds quickly hid the sun setting over the horizon, as Paulifio could not see any ships nearby with his super penguin vision. Janito fell asleep, as all of the action she observed today overwhelmed her state of indifference. Then, a penguin surfaced from the cold frigid waters, and jumped on a broken sheet of ice in the middle of the cove. Paulifio began to waddle a few feet back from the shore to safety.

"Paulifio! There is a reason why you got those super penguin powers! You need to save the world from a new threat. A threat never seen before from human kind. What will happen when all the homes in the USA, Europe, and Canada when the good people are unable to enter their homes to watch Flipper on sting ray DVD,  look at their posters of "Free Willey", or even enjoy an evening with their gold fish!".

Paulifio pinched himself again, to be sure this was no longer a dream "Listen, I tell you Mr. Penguin, that people do not idolize fish like you do here! Who cares if people cannot fantasize over their fish heroes? I know I too cried at "The Coquettish Cod who dreamed of a Nibbling Trout", as their families never accepted the other side... But barriers can be broken! Listen, I will just sit here and twiddle my thumbs until you tell me how to get back to civilization!"

The Penguin then looked in all seriousness at his new prodigy "No, listen to me and you better stop twiddling your thumbs before you make me dizzy. You are too fast now, too powerful, to do that sort of thing. The evil Penguino, my nemesis, has a plan to plug all of the sewers in the developing world.. By using his elite army of blow fish, he intends to lead them up into every pipe that spews out liquid crud... By doing so, no human will be able to stay in their homes.. They will not work, not get any sleep, and probably be less productive... Thus, the stock market will collapse... And the developing world, will stink! You need to stop the evil Penguino, and his army of blow fish before it is too late! Or the world may succumb to floating toilet bowl turds!"

Paulifio sighed and nodded his head, as he looked at a sleeping Janito "Fine. Now how do I find the evil Penguino, and where is his army?"

The penguin then added "Remember, you can swim at speeds upwards to a thousand nautical miles per hour.. And come up for air every 3 hours... Just like Penguino, who had swallowed the same 'sacred' sewer eating fish as you! Jump in the water, and head towards the Atlantic near Cuba, immediately! There, under the water, you will see a huge swarm of blow fish.. Ready to jump into the septic lines of the nations! And to bring the developing world to its knees!"

Paulifio then nodded, and placed Janito on his shoulders. He swam like a true jet boat, creating an enormous wave wherever he swam. He pushed with his feet at super kicking speed, with Janito hanging on for dear life. He could not plunge under water, as he nearly drowned Janito on his first dive off of Antarctica, so he swam above water. Huge ships, military boats, rocked in the humongous waves he had just created. He even tried peeing under water, but he accidently hit a white shark and knocked him unconscious. He performed CPR on the 30 foot shark as it floated on the waters surface, as Janito tried to wag its tail in order to get some movement back. The shark revived, and Paulifio hauled out one of its jagged razor tooth as he could see with his penguin vision that he had a cavity.

"Good, now you are alright, little fella", as Paulifio grabbed the big fishes tail and threw him a half a mile from where he bobbed in the ocean. Janito watched as the shark flew a few hundred feet in the air. Paulifio dropped the shark tooth in her right hand "Take that in case you need a few replacements.. I can make a few teeth out of that one... Would you like a few vampire ones?"

Janito smiled and said "No, I will make a necklace out of this one, Paulifio... We better continue to Argentina, there we can rest and get supplies for our voyage"

Part 4

Paulifio, then hit the coast of beautiful Argentina, in a little fishing village.. Walking up the street of the small fishing community, there he could smell the wonderful aroma of a striped bass being eating outside a small restaurant terrace.  He ran over and placed his nostrils right over the connoisseurs plate, and asked "Can I at least have the tail?"  The man who was eating a romantic afternoon diner with his wife, slapped Paulifio across the face with his hand. Paulifio then grabbed the man with one arm and screamed "Where is this fishes head, its guts, and sea poop! It is all good, you know!"

The man then got free from Paulifio, ran from the restaurant into the main lobby to complain, as his wife followed suit in disgust. Paulifio then chowed down on the plate of luxurious fish, as his wife had a lobster bisque "Delicious, Janito... Do you want some? How about some escargots? Garlic.. Yum!"

Janito frowned upon Paulifios actions, as she grabbed his hand and they both ran off before the owner of the restaurant could fire a few rounds of ammunition at them...

Walking down the street, there he seen a beautiful panda bear costume hanging from a low hanging clothesline... Just what the doctor ordered! A superhero suit, that could portray the penguins proud colors!

Janito disproved immediately "That is a panda suit! It is furry, and heavy. You will sweat like a pig in there, Paulifio!"

Paulifio smiled at his lovely dissenter "No, Janito. It is perfect, as it sports the proud penguin colors. Who cares if I got two ears in the wrong place? Two black eyes, a white head, and furry. I love it! Penguin or Panda, what is the difference!"

Janito got on the back of her Panda, as he waddled at over a 100 miles an hour chugging through the jungles of South America to get to the Caribbean sea. From there, he dove into the ocean and heading at a thousand nautical miles per hour, he could see a foaming or unsettling of the waters just ahead.. Just off of the shores of Cuba.

He ducked into the ocean and could see the massive army of hundreds of millions of blow fish, heading to the continental USA. He rose to the surface, so his human companion could get some air, who was piggy backing him all the way.

Then, a massive wave of water came up and threw him and Janito up a thousand feet in the air, as they both landed on top of a Cuban Royal Palm Tree, that split in two halves as Paulifio was a powerful penguin. Janito landed softly on top of the hero.

Then, Penguino appeared riding a boogie board, and slammed into the beach with a massive wave at his back.  The waters washed right into the motels and lobbies of the small Cuban community, as people ran to the high ground.

Paulifio waddled in a circular path at a hundred miles an hour as to create a vortex of water, and waved his arms to aim it at Penguino.. Penguino just jumped over it and laughed hysterically at this funny looking person in a panda suit.

"I am Penguino... You may have heard of my legend from the fearsome stories from sonar buoys placed all over the ocean floors, tracking my incredible underwater speed! What is with that stupid panda outfit, by the way?"

Paulifio yelled "Panda outfit? Can you not see, that I am Penguin Man! Sonar buoys? You probably heard of my story from the thousands of Manatee that found help for their sluggish style of life. I gave them some red bull, and they then began to immediately apply for some jobs at Seaworld! No dolphins would talk to me later, though"

Penguino had the form of a true penguin, only 4 times the size of a normal one. He then made a mad rush to peck at his enemy with his strong, super beak! "What an insult to our penguin nation! Wearing a Panda suit, and you call yourself a penguin?"  Paulifio dodged his peck to the right side, then to the left, all the time dodging his massive beak that smashed trees and cement columns that stood near the beach.

"Why are you trying to plug the worlds toilets?", as Paulifio dodged a swing from Penguinos right wing, that cut down a metal sign post.  

"Simple. I have a company that flips houses in the developing world. As soon as the homes become stinky, destitute, and left alone, I will flip these houses to make lots of money! And use the money to blast old dormant volcanoes, to create so much airborne dust that it will block the suns precious rays, and then create a world of ice! A world or renewal for me and my penguin friends! And I will be penguin emperor!"

Paulifio and Penguino battled down the beach, smashing hotels, restaurants, and sand castles along the way. Paulifio then smelled squid, which drove him crazy, like a cat wanting deep southern fried crab cakes! He took the battle over to a freezer located outside of the fish restaurant, thinking that Penguino had the same deep desire for it as he did.

He got away far enough from Penguino that he lifted the freezer high enough above his head, and slammed it over the penguins body. Penguino just about lifted the freezer off of his head, but he could not resist eating all of the squid before he could go into battle mode again. This gave time for Paulifio to put his plan in motion.

He quickly tied 20 parasails together, as Paulifio waddled around his prey at a hundred miles per hour, using steel cable to tie up Penguino who just got finished his delicious frozen food meal. Lastly, diving and connecting the sails to a school of dolphin, they took Penguino really high up in the air, and towards the southern extremities of the Atlantic Ocean....

Now, Janito watched as Paulifio opened a can of cat chow tuna, and began wolfing down the whole case! Cats growled at him from the beach benches, in total disgust. "Paulifio, the blow fish! You need to act fast! Stop eating that stuff, it will definitely cause you to want a box full of kitty litter!"

Paulifio threw down his empty cat chow can, as he nearly forgot about his mission again... He swam at a thousand miles per hour, to get to a Venezuela river, where there he netted a million piranha fish. Heading towards the Florida coast, he unleashed the piranha's just below and all around the blow fish... It did not take long...

As the blow fish were eaten by the piranha, so the piranha died from the poisoning the blow fish gave off from their bodies... 
There on the Florida coast, Paulifio was eating some discarded fish guts from a fish processing facility... Janito held him around his waist.. In total adoration.. In between bites of fish liver and fins, they french kissed... As a penguin from Antarctica bobbed up, and waved to him.. "Great work, Penguin man!" He winked at his newly created super hero, as he threw a fish head at him.. He happily gulped it down... Things were safe, for now... Penguino, would, make his crazy return, someday...

And all of the free world.. was safe, again...


Thanks to, Penguin Man!!!








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