Skip to main content

Steel Heart: High Tech warrior from the 1300s.

King Pladamius, in his little feudal town of France, was getting worried. His peasants were complaining of several attacks from a Dragon, and were so infuriated, that they were beginning to protest by not paying their taxes. King Pladamius decided to call on a true hero, to save his kingdom and save his reputation as being a cruel but decisive problem solver. He called non other, than Steel Heart into his court at his castle one day!

Steel Heart walked into the court, smiling at the lovely lady Pataguin. Pataguin sighed, and began fanning herself intensely as the heat of the mid summers day sweltered the huge, stone, opened court. King Pladamius grunted at his wife, Pataguin, as she then took a stern look at Steel Heart.

"Steel Heart. You who have saved millions from starving. Who has brought down the evil tyrant, Pulgie Winkle the Third. You who had stopped the English invaders by catapulting a new age food over to their shores, forcing the starving lot of them to head back for a delicious bite of something you called 'Fish and Chips'. There is no end to your glory, ahem.."

Steel Heart took out his sword from his sheath, raising it up high, began to scream "If this is a trap for me, King Pladamius, I warn you! My sword is sharp and I got a mild touch of the crabs. I am not in the mood to be here all day scratching, waiting for you to try to kill me. I may start scratching and chopping right now! Ha ha ha!"

Steel Heart waved his sword back and forth, as the hundred men surrounding him backed off in fear. King Pladamius raised his hands "Steel Heart, I want you to solve a problem for me. A dragon has been on the loose in my Kingdom, pillaging and making a hard time for the peasants all around. Problem is, they will not pay taxes to me, when this dragon continually harasses them! There is but one solution! I want you to go down and kill all the peasants! Everyone of them! This way here, this will stop the nagging from the peasants and restore my peace of mind from my advisors!"

Steel Heart scratched his crutch and thought about this for a minute "My Lord, by killing the peasants, you will have no more exuberant taxes to collect in order to pay me! Spare the peasants, as I do not wish to sharpen my sword after killing every 100 of them! I will bravely face this dragon, and bring him to his knees, by God!"

Pladamius got up from his mighty throne and raised his hands, with a big applaud from the spectators there in the hall "So be it! Not only you are ruthless, but you are weird in thinking also. We will kill the dragon instead! And the land will reign my tyranny again!" Pataguin got up and began to jump excitedly, up and down while revealing her underwear at times to Steel Heart.

Steel Heart cut the wind, as it echoed down the hallway in a large thunder "I will need your weapons specialist to design me some top secret, weapons, in order to defeat this monster without me getting as much as a nail broken on this mission"

To be continued...


Popular posts from this blog

My Dog has ate a Ferrero Rocher.

I had only went into a store to buy a few Ferrero Rocher packages of chocolates... Then, I went into the next store, not realizing that I left the small, 3 chocolates per package, delicious Rochers in my middle vehicle organizer. On the way back, I did not even notice.

I had got out of my vehicle, and only when I went to search for something on that side, it all came together. The package was torn, with only one individually wrapped Ferro Rocher out of its packaging. She had selected one, and even tore the golden foil paper from the once existing Rocher Chocolate.

I looked over at my Dog. This was a little too much for me to handle. I yelled "Pushkin! You ate one of my Ferrero Rocher!"  Is she the only dog in the world that probably ate a Ferrero Rocher.

Good point in standing, she actually thought the process through. She did not destroy the three chocolates in the package, all in one bite. She used her incisors, exactly as a surgeon would, to take apart the package from t…

The Self Publishing 12 days of Christmas for 95 % of us...

What does Christmas mean for the majority of us self published authors. I think of the 12 days of self publishing... Scrooge approved.

1. The usual "Gesh, I didn't know you wrote a book! Where did you find time for that" from festive long lost friends or relatives.

2. When your manly friends tell you "Oh, I did'nt have time to read your books, but my wife read it and she sure likes it... But she likes just about anything she reads"

3. Where can I get a copy of that. I don't got a credit card so I can't order it online... Do you got any free copies...

4. The wife tells you "Why are you spending so much time on that thing. You got wood to split!"

5. Your son tells you "You should have put more pictures in that novel, dad. Maybe then I would have read it"

6. Your local library tells you "Oh, what a cute little book... We will put it way up there on the top shelf where it will keep the dust from falling on the traditional books"


Part 4 is free and available but in limited quantities!

Part 4 is free for now, and available in limited quanties ( 50 downloads per day),  500 per month...

At least I think I set it up that way... Here is the link to Bookfunnel.

I tried Goodreads Giveaway, but you had to be a member of KDP publishing on Amazon. Frustrating, but there is always another way to skin a cat.

I waited a long time for Goodreads to offer ebook giveaways to everybody, but that only included KDP authors from Amazon.

So, I had to take it to this route. And to give my book to many, to get the word out. Something an author has a hard time to do, to sink the flagship battleship!!! 

Oh well, hope there are some positives out of this... I hope... Download it for free, if you can get it in time before the downloads run out!

Have a supermarket kind of day...