Skip to main content

Ipoitie realizes there are no more Holidays until Valentines.

Ipoitie watched as all of the New Years decorations were being placed away in a box.  His mother then put up the old boring family black and white pictures, with her Greek God statues. Ipoitie sighed. No more fun, until Valentines when he might be able to kiss a few ladies. He was 18 and decided not to go to college, but party wide open for a year. So he stayed at home, while all his friends went back to college, to get an education.

Ipoitie yelled at his mother "Give me the keys to the car. There must be a holiday being celebrated somewhere, in this wild old world".  His Mother, Montinita, replied "No car after your binge drinking last night. The holidays are over, time for you to dry out. There is a big mug of coffee out on the table, in the kitchen there!".  Ipoitie hissed at his mother, and decided to go to his room and listen to his heavy metal cd's.

He listened to "We are going to rock and roll, all night, and Party Every Day!" from Kiss. He smiled, as he began tossing his empty beer bottle in the air. He then got two, then three, and began juggling them. He then opened his window, as there were some pretty ladies in some ski doo suits outside, who began to run to the house.

His mother heard the door bell. She ran over to open the door, "Oh, my ladies, what are you..." they ran bye her and headed towards Ipoties room. There, they began to pillow fight, giggle and laugh for the rest of the afternoon.

His mother then began to rock with them. She opened the door, and began to bang on pots and pans. She gave his son a 40 ouncer of whisky. She threw in a bag of marijuana. Then things really took on a holiday of their own. He began to smash the walls, the ladies began to tear apart the ceiling fan. Breaking the lovely dresser glass, that cost a few thousand dollars in price. His mother laughed, and headed out towards the phone in the living room.

Finally, the police came in with their tazer guns and tear gas. The rolled one into the room. Everyone began crying, and moaning in tremendous discomfort on the floor. The cops began billy clubbing the teenagers, and began tazering them at will.

Ipoitie then said "Mom, what are you doing. You tricked me, by giving me that 40 ouncer of alcohol. You knew I would lose control! Darn it all!"

Ipoities Mom replied "You are going to jail for a few months, until Valentines day, Ipoitie. I need a holiday, a sort of break, you know".

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

My Dog has ate a Ferrero Rocher.

I had only went into a store to buy a few Ferrero Rocher packages of chocolates... Then, I went into the next store, not realizing that I left the small, 3 chocolates per package, delicious Rochers in my middle vehicle organizer. On the way back, I did not even notice.

I had got out of my vehicle, and only when I went to search for something on that side, it all came together. The package was torn, with only one individually wrapped Ferro Rocher out of its packaging. She had selected one, and even tore the golden foil paper from the once existing Rocher Chocolate.

I looked over at my Dog. This was a little too much for me to handle. I yelled "Pushkin! You ate one of my Ferrero Rocher!"  Is she the only dog in the world that probably ate a Ferrero Rocher.

Good point in standing, she actually thought the process through. She did not destroy the three chocolates in the package, all in one bite. She used her incisors, exactly as a surgeon would, to take apart the package from t…

The Self Publishing 12 days of Christmas for 95 % of us...

What does Christmas mean for the majority of us self published authors. I think of the 12 days of self publishing... Scrooge approved.

1. The usual "Gesh, I didn't know you wrote a book! Where did you find time for that" from festive long lost friends or relatives.

2. When your manly friends tell you "Oh, I did'nt have time to read your books, but my wife read it and she sure likes it... But she likes just about anything she reads"

3. Where can I get a copy of that. I don't got a credit card so I can't order it online... Do you got any free copies...

4. The wife tells you "Why are you spending so much time on that thing. You got wood to split!"

5. Your son tells you "You should have put more pictures in that novel, dad. Maybe then I would have read it"

6. Your local library tells you "Oh, what a cute little book... We will put it way up there on the top shelf where it will keep the dust from falling on the traditional books"

7…